


seifuku striders ★ sekai o sukuu

by Noa



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gakuen, Crack, Gen, Implied Relationships, M/M, Stridercest - Freeform, happy birthday sleii, i cant believe i wrote this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-16
Updated: 2013-09-16
Packaged: 2017-12-26 17:20:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/968499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noa/pseuds/Noa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He looks outside the window, where clear blue skies stretch cloudlessly for as far as he can see, and mutters that he’d kill for some action right about now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	seifuku striders ★ sekai o sukuu

Dave absently taps the end of his pencil to his lips, and stares at the chalkboard as the teacher works out a math problem.  A quick glance around the room confirms that everyone there is at least as bored as Dave is, heads resting on hands, and yawns spreading like an epidemic. It must be tough, teaching math on a Friday afternoon, the last class before the weekend, but that doesn’t make Dave hate it any less. He looks outside the window, where clear blue skies stretch cloudlessly for as far as he can see, and mutters that he’d kill for some action right about now.

As if he summoned it, his phone vibrates in the pocket of his uniform’s shorts. Dave sits up straight, and avoids making eye contact with anyone who turned to face him at the buzzing sound. He gets his phone out, and opens the message that just came in.

TT: Dave, you available?

Dave gratefully texts back, happy to have a distraction.

TG: yeah  
TG: go

Moments later, his phone buzzes again. Dave smiles apologetically at his surrounding classmates, and turns off vibrate before checking Dirk’s reply.

TT: Got a bit of a situation here.  
TG: what kind of situation  
TT: The giant robot kind.  
TG: oh snap  
TG: where are you  
TT: Roof.  
TG: wait dude how are you even texting me  
TG: arent you getting your sweet shota butt kicked rn  
TT: Just get your ass up here already.  
TG: yessir  
TG: on my way

Dave excuses himself, ignoring the envious glares of his peers as he slips out of class. He exits through an open window in the boy’s bathroom, and scales the fire escape as fast as he can manage. Once he gets to the roof, Dirk is already there, dodging missiles. He heaves a relieved sigh at the sight of Dave, and extends his fist towards him. Dave nods, runs up, and slides across the gravel as he touches his fist to Dirk’s. Sparks fly from their contact, and a catchy anime theme starts playing in the background as their transformation sequence begins.

For a moment, both Striders are naked against a backdrop of soft pinks and flowery motives, until sailor uniforms materialize on their bodies. Bobby pins appear in their hair (fighting evil was significantly harder with your bangs getting in your eyes all the time); Dirk’s was decorated with a heart, where Dave’s had a gear.  From two clusters of colorless glitters, a long katana forms itself into Dirk’s hand, and Dave was armed with a slim, somewhat damaged sword.

They go through their routine of obligatory super hero poses to complete the sequence, and their shades simultaneously catch a glimpse of sunlight. Dirk brushes his plaid skirt down, and sighs that he doesn’t really see the point of such an extravagant scene. Dave fingers the pin in his hair, and comments that he finds it kind of cool. At least they didn’t have to recite cheesy catchphrases. With that, Dirk agrees.

The impact of another missile right between the two boys, draws their attention back to the matter at hand. LE-BOT whirs and rattles as it prepares another attack, but both Striders jump away before it’s robotic fist can connect. Dave rams his sword into a metallic finger, and holds on tight, letting himself get dragged back towards their nemesis’s body. The giant robot tries to shake him off, and the creases of Dave’s skirt flutter as he clings to his sword.

Dirk takes advantage of the distraction Dave provided, and assaults the enemy with a barrage of homing throwing stars. They hit the junction of the robot’s knees, where they explode, and LE-BOT stumbles briefly. One of its giant hands reaches to hold on to the school building, as it tries to regain his balance. Though Dirk realizes that he and Dave are the only ones who can actually _see_ mankind’s greatest enemy, he can’t help but wonder how no one seems to notice the complete destruction it leaves in its wake. Using weather conditions as an excuse would have to have its limits, right? Then again, Dirk was a protagonist- such matters were none of his concern.

Dave’s thoughts aren’t with plot holes either; the temporary sway in the robot’s step had given him the opportunity to run up its metal arm, dragging his sword across the plated surface as he climbs his way towards its face.

LE-BOT roars monotonously, and swats at the air around itself as if it’s trying to squish a fly. Dirk tries to keep it occupied with constant waves of throwing stars and the occasional taunt, some of which make Dave snort sarcastically as he progresses towards their enemy’s cue ball eyes.

“You don’t stand a chance, you big ugly pile of English scrap metal! We’re going to take you down! (○･｀Д´･○) ” Dirk yells passionately, bright colors of the backdrop accentuating the severity of his threat.  
“Yeah man, what he said. (-、-) ” Dave adds, bobbing his head to the beat as the background music intensifies.

Dirk jumps on the other arm of LE-BOT when it strikes at him, and runs up to join Dave at the robot’s face. They cross swords, and assume bad-ass stances as they ready themselves for their Special Strider Attack.

The sparkles are near-blinding as their blades charge up, the pins in their hair shining bright. With movements coordinated in a way only twins can manage, they surge forward, and launch themselves at the robot’s moving eyes, ramming their swords into the shifting cue balls until the exterior cracks and shatters under the pressure.

LE-BOT roars and shrieks as its blinded, smoke drifting up from its broken eyes. Dave and Dirk retreat with synchronized backflips as the giant robot circuits out. They make sure to face away from their enemy as LE-BOT topples over, and combusts. Dirk adjusts his shades and Dave runs a hand through his hair, as the hot air from the explosion tugs at their sailor uniforms. They exchange victorious grins, and Dirk reaches for Dave’s hand. Dave takes it, and an unseen force lifts them slightly from the roof as they are enveloped in soft light, and transform back into their regular appearances.

John finds them on the roof moments later, a pile of limbs tangled together in an afternoon nap. He shakes his head and smiles, not realizing that his life has just been saved again.

“Hey, wake up you guys!” He leans over and prods Dave’s side. Dave startles and jerks up, looking around as if he’s trying to locate a fire. Dirk slowly gets himself upright from having been wrapped around Dave, and rubs his temples with a heavy sigh. Even with sunglasses, the lightshow that came with their transformations always left him with a headache.

“This is the third time this week.” John says, and he holds out his hand for Dave to take, but Dave and Dirk are already getting back on their feet by themselves. John awkwardly sticks his hand inside his pocket. “One of these days it’s going to be a teacher catching you dozing off!”

Dirk growls, but Dave places a pacifying hand on his shoulder, and stops Dirk before he can accidentally blow their cover by informing John of what _really_ went down just now. Then, Jake appears on the roof as well, carrying both Dave’s and Dirk’s backpacks on his shoulder.

“Oh, there you are!” Jake says excitedly. Dirk and Dave briefly meet eyes, before flawlessly falling back into their roles of regular (yet extremely cool) teenagers. The four of them descend back down from the roof, making small talk as they prepare to start their weekend.

TT: Good work back there.  
TG: you too man  
TG: do you think hell build another soon  
TT: I don’t know. Probably.  
TG: i could do with a break  
TG: this sweet anime life is starting to get pretty damn exhausting  
TT: I hear you.  
TT: At least we never have to fear bad hair days.  
TG: amen brother  
TG: a fucking men  
TT: My room, or yours?  
TG: my vote goes to shower  
TG: motor oil gets fucking everywhere  
TT: Oh, the tragedy of having a mecha nemesis.  
TG: dont even joke about that shit man  
TT: Shower it is.

-

From behind a transparent sheen of soapy material, two guardians look down on Dirk and Dave as they walk home from school.

“Dave completely wrecked that shitty robot.” One of them says, folding his arms in front of his chest, a proud look on his face.  
“Meh. Couldn’t have done it without Dirk keeping up those rad ninja attacks.” The other counters, before he casually slides his hands inside his pockets.

The two make eye contact for a brief moment, and then the showdown breaks loose.

“Dave’s faster.”  
“Dirk’s smarter.”  
“Dave’s got a better ass.”  
“At least Dirk knows how to wear a skirt.”  
“Probably learned that from you, didn’t he?”  
“You’re just jealous because my kid is cooler than yours.”  
“Bullshit.”  
“They make a good team though.”  
“That they do.”

The guardians share a moment of proud silence, a celebration for finding something both of them agree on. Shortly after, they turn away to move on to the next dream bubble, before their current one gets the chance to pop. As their surroundings shift around them, the guardian without a hat speaks up again.

“And Dirk’s got a bigger dick.”

**-fin**

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday sleii, wishing you health, happiness and hot striders for many more to come!


End file.
